BlogPositive

Been there, seen that

I was watching an interview with Alan Sugar today. He was talking about the new series of the Apprentice.  During the interview he was asked about the credit crunch, had it affected him, how did he view it.

He said that when you've been in business as long as he has, one of the benefits of age, is that you know that this is just a phase. We've seen this happen before. Eventually it will bottom out and everything will start to rise again.  We don't need to run around panicking cos we have seen it before.  We know that its not the end of civilization as we know it.

I have to say that this is one place where I actually agree with Sugar. Yes I know you might find that hard to believe! However its true. As we get older we have loads of experiences under our belt. We really have been there and got the T shirt.  So we start to see the cycles of life. After all flares did come back into fashion, as did scooters although they were updated for the modern age.

So if life seems on a downward trend then its time to think back to last time you saw this happen and then to rememer that it did turn of its own accord. Life is not like a kamikaze always heading downwards.  So remember to say more often "been there, seen that" and use that experience to help you today.

Earthquake survivor

I was shaken about in my bed last night, not by an exciting intimate adventure but by the earthquake. It was very scary and I'd have leaped out if it had gone on much longer.  I didn't even realise it was a quake until this morning.  So I've clocked that up as another new experience.

These new experiences can become fewer on the ground as we grow older.  We surround ourselves with our comfort blanket of old acquaintances, rituals, places, experiences and grow timid about that unexplored territory just outside our door.  Yet when we do step out there it can be refreshing, invigorating and give us a whole new perspective on the world.  Although we may think we've done it all there will always be new things to see, to do, to hear, to experience.

Now we have less to prove so its easier to take the risk.  Get out there today, demand those new experiences, they are as much for you as they are for your younger friends and colleagues.  You've earned the opportunity and will benefit so much more than someone without your long lifetime of knowledge, incidents and happenings.

Crackerjack

At the weekend I was away with friends and someone looked at the clock and said "Its 5 to 5."  Several of us replied "Its Friday, its 5 to 5 and its CRACKERJACK!"

Now that will only mean something to you if you are probably over 45 and remember watching this on childrens TV.  I find as I'm getting older that encoutering people that share those childhood memories gives me a really warm feeling.  Its about knowing that I don't have to explain those things to them, knowing that we share a certain level of understanding and have both experienced that particular patch of history. It means that you establish rapport more easily cos you already have lots in common.

And it seems to me that this has become a more intense feeling as the years have passed.  Maybe when we are younger the mishmash of experiences that we shared weren't brought into such sharp focus or felt so intensely.  Or maybe its the distance from the event that lends us those rose tinted glasses.  Whatever it is I think we should celebrate and hold onto those shared moments of childhood history.  Everyone wave their Crackerjack pencils now!

The old way is best?

I've got great gaps in the brickwork in my porch and yesterday finally got aorund to filling them with expanding foam filler.  This only took about 20 minutes and has done a pretty good job too.  However later on I was reflecting that the other alternative would have been to mix up some mortar and repoint the areas in need of it.  That's what should have been done when the porch was built, probably about 40 years ago.  However its much quicker and pretty much as effective to use the foam.

One thing I have noticed about getting older is that I can keep doing things the old way, becasue I know how it works, I'm comfortable with it, when there may be better ways to do things.  So I spent many months thinking about buying mortar (and always rememberig after I'd left the DIY shop).  Then the other day I saw the foam filler cans and just bought them almost without thinking.

So there are times when we should stick to the old ways but we should also recognise that the world is moving on with us and new ways of doing things are appearing every day.  We should always investiagate these as with our life experience we'll be able to judge very quickly if they are better than our exisitng ways.

What new things will you try to day?  What old ways are you going to dump?  What are you going to experiment with?

Christmas Humbug

Christmas is not like it used to be!  How often have you heard people bemoaning how bad things are now compared to "when I was a lad".  Well I do agree to some extent. One of the benefits of just having been around on this planet for a while is that we have seen lots of changes, so Christmas is probably very different for us now than it was when we were 8 or 9, a teenager or in our 20s or 30s. Change isn't always good either as some things can appear to be much worse than they used to be.

However we should spend more time focusing on the positive changes rather than bemoaning the negative ones.  So for me my Christmas is now better than it was a few years ago as being self employed I have a longer period of time off.  That is balanced though by needing to stay in touch, keep a check on my emails and also keep writing these blogs!

Then if you really do want to look at the negative changes, instead of just moaning about it actually do something about it.  If you aren't prepared to do something about it then shut up - that's what I say!

Make a list now of ten things about your Christmas than are better when you compare this year with 10 years ago.  Go on you can do it!

Friday night

This weekend I seem to have given myself an impossible list of things to do. I have lots of writing to do (in addition to the blogs) and everything seems to have come together at the same time. I have evaluation reports, tenders, courses, articles, the newsletter and broadcast pieces to write.  And also I want to get a new crop of poems ready for submission for a competition by next week.

This has all meant that its a working weekend, starting on Friday night.  When I am working at the weekend, especially on Friday and Saturday night, I sometimes feel like I have no life and I should be out on the tiles like everyone else. However when I ask around I find that lots of people are not out on the weekend nights cos its too busy, too expensive, no transport, too cold, wet, can't be bothered!  So I do know that I'm not the only one sitting at home beavering away.

This has only come to us as we have got older, we've lost the fear that if we are not down the pub on Friday night we'll miss something important.  I used to worry that if I didn't get out I might end up really boring with nothing to talk about, but that has not turned out to be true, I'm never stuck for conversation.  Its actually quite a relief to know that there is no restless imperative to get out on the town, getting dressed up, coming home late, tired, penniless or drunk (or all 4)!

What do you not miss that you used to do?  What are you relived that you can let go now that you're older (and wiser)? Lets celebrate being more our own person and less following the crowd!

Seen it all before

Still sitting at Heathrow delayed by fog, 5 hours after landing from Delhi, when I should have been arriving home about now.  However, the bonus of getting older is that I’ve seen it all before, been delayed before and eventually got home.  That means that whenever I travel I’m prepared.  Its not that I expect the worst to happen, just that my experience shows that if it does, its best to have some small comforts to while away the hours and help keep me occupied and feeling good.

Experience told me that there must be somewhere to have a shower, so I found somewhere.  Experience told me that when there are delays they give out refreshment vouchers so I asked for one (I’ve now had two cos we’ve been here so long).  Experience told me that there are always quiet corners away from the crowds near to power points so I am now sitting on the floor typing upstairs where the air of resentment from delayed passengers isn’t quite so bad.  Experience told me to pack toothpaste, moisturiser and spare underwear, just in case, now I’m very glad I did.

All of this adds up to me being a lot more prepared and comfortable I than might have been if I hadn’t encountered this sort of thing before.  However many of us discount the experience that we have built up over time in our lives, failing to capitalise on it and recognise its worth.  I’ve worked with so many people who have change fatigue, but who don’t recognise that they actually have very good strategies for coping with change.  I’ve encountered people with great skills who don’t recognise how transferable those skills are.

What experience do you have that makes you a saleable item?  What’s your unique selling point – that combination of skills and experience that sets you apart from anyone else?  What valuable experience have you even forgotten you have?  Experience is currency – how are you going to add to your experience bank this week?

Kashmir

In 8 hours I am on a flight to Delhi and then on to Srinagar in Kashmir by way of Shimla. I'm really excited to have this opportunity to work out there. I'm particularly interested to see how their attitudes to older people might differ from ours further West. Watch this space!

Creativity

I've been on a creativity in business course this week.  It was a fabulously stimulating experience and I'd reccomend it to anyone.  I got to thinking about how our creativity is fueled and part of this is about connections.  A lot of these can be contributed to experience.

If you have a wide experience of food then you can probably think of lots of things to do with green beans. You'll have experienced soups and salads and a vareity of dishes which had other ingredients but where you could easily contruct them using green beans.  If you diet consisted solely of boiled green beans then you would probably find it difficult to think of many other ways to serve them.

One thing that is true as we get older is that we have a greater store of experiences and there are some experiences that we have repeated many times.  This gives us a great wealth of material within which we can make new connections.  After coming back from holiday in India you'll be making green bean curry, which you'd never thought of before. So as well as older and wiser we are also older and more creative.

The shifting horizon

Today I was chatting to my neighbours as we were packing up their house.  In their search for somewhere new they had been shown some "old folks" houses, as they put it.  They are both drawing a pension although I don't know how old they are.  What we then began to talk about was how we neither of us had got to a position of considering ourselves to be old.  It was like a continually shifting horizon.  When you are a young child you consider your parents to be old but then when you reach their age you certainly don't feel old and then in your twenties you might consider those over 50 or 60 to be old.  But when you get there yourself again it doesn't feel like that.

You are the age you are and only you can decide if you should feel old.  Its interesting how what we feel, how we think and our behaviours and activities are all linked.  So if you decide that you will think and act like a "youngster" then you will certainly feel like that as well.  And remember that no-one can make you feel old.  You control your feelings so if you have decided to feel old today then thats just fine cos tomorrow you can decide to feel young or intelligent or confident or excited or any one of a host of positive feelings that you know of as you have experienced them in the past.  And if you have already experienced it you can do it again.

So go on, decide to feel any age you want today and see how the people around you react.