BlogPositive

Trimming psychology

Today I was having my hair cut. My hairdresser at Toni & Guy Carlisle is Chinese so we were talking about the Chinese New Year. This fell on Monday and many people will be celebrating over the weekend. I asked him if he would be celebrating the Chinese New Year. He said that he didn't need it to be New Year to have a reason to celebrate. He'll be getting a bottle of wine out anyway.

I absolutely approve of that attitude. Why do we always need to wait for a "Special Occasion" to celebrate? How do you feel when you celebrate? You feel great, happy, euphoric, up, buzzing. Why would you want to wait to feel like that? Wouldn't it be great to feel like that every day?

So I recommend that you celebrate every day, just like my hairdresser. At the end of the day work out what went well today. What are your achievements? What did you do well? What did people thank you for? What should you give yourself a pat on the back for? It doesn't need to be anything major, even just getting through the day can be an achievement.

Once you've done that work out what the celebration will be. It doesn't have to be alcoholic!! Maybe its just allowing yourself an extra ten minutes in bed tomorrow, or eating that extra special yoghurt you've been saving, or phoning a friend you've not spoken to for ages.

The more you celebrate the more positive you'll become, the more positive you are the more success you'll attract and the more you'll have to celebrate. It's a virtuous circle. What are you celebrating today?

Old and simple remedies

There was an item on the news tonight about some research into flu. They've found that you can significantly reduce your risk of infection by wearing a mask. Not just any old wad of cotton though, a proper sugical mask. Its really surprising that no-one has done this research before. It just indicates that there are still old fashioned and easy ways to solve problems still waiting to be discovered, even today in the 21st century. We should remember this when trying to solve our own problems. Instead of seeking a complicated and many layered solution, ask yourself "Whats the simplest and easiest answer to this problem?" I have a friend who is trying to get his dog looked after when he's on holiday. Taking it to the kennels seems obvious but its complicated by their strict opening hours, his lack of car and of course the cost. He has another friend who loves dogs, would pick it up, drop it off and lavish it with love and long walks. Problem solved easily. The other day I ended up at Birmingham instead of Bristol when my flight was re-routed. The complexity of getting from there to my final destination by public transport was baffling. Just hire a car, get in it and drive there. Simple. Sorted. Ok, not very kind to the planet but got me where I needed to be. So don't struggle with long winded answers, solutions that need a degree to understand them or resolutions written on more than half a page. Get simple and your problems at home and at work disappear more quickly.

Your top team

Who are your top team? They are your board of directors, your trusted advisors, your unofficial mentors and coaches. Most companies however small have a team that helps them set strategy, deal with major issues and plan their growth. As an individual you can do exactly the same thing and have a top team who you talk to when you need advice.

I'm considering making major changes to my business life and about a month ago I was mulling over the opportunity. I felt uncomfortable and sort of edgy about it and knew I needed to get the advice of my top team. Because my business is me, any major changes are as much about me as they are about the business. I have a top team who I consult about major things in my life. In the space of one evening I spoke to 7 very different people, all friends who know me well. They had very different perceptions of what this might mean for me. They each highlighted different things that I should be thinking about and had a different reaction to the idea. Some were very cautious, some thought it was a risky move, some thought it might compromise my freedom to do the other things that I enjoy doing and some saw it as a fantastic opportunity.

However none of them said they didn't want to talk about it and they all said that I should keep in touch about what was happening. After these calls I felt much more settled. Although I hadn't made a final decision about what to do I felt I was better prepared to ask the right questions that would help me to gather the data that I needed. I've spoken to them all again this week as the matter progresses. It's a difficult one to make a decision about and although no-one else can make the decision for me, knowing that the top team care about my happiness and my future really helps.

Who are your top team? When did you last ask then for advice? How can you include them more in your decision making? What can you do to help them in return?

When would you give up?

I had an interesting day in Thursday. I flew to Bristol to get to a meeting in Devon. After two aborted landings in fog, we got re-routed and I ended up in Birmingham. We sat on the tarmac for ages before the captain made a decision to fly us back to Bristol. I worked out that by the time we had got clearance and actually got back it would too late for me to make it by bus and train to my meeting. I therefore asked to get off the plane. The EasyJet staff were quite shocked by this. Clearly its an irregular request and they didn't really have a procedure. However once I had said I wanted to get off so did 5 other people.

So I got off and hired a car to drive to Devon. Then the M5 was closed. Although I avoided this, thanks to information from my world class PA, the A roads around the diversion were still very congested. I did finally reach my destination about 2 hours late and was able to have my meeting.

However a lot of other people would have given up. How much determination do you have to keep going when the going gets tough? What would it actually take to make you give up? Do you give up too easily? Do you keep going when its hopeless?

Sometimes you have to make apparently foolish decisions in the face of difficult circumstances. But at least you have done something to keep moving forwards. The most frustrating time for me on Thursday was sitting on the tarmac. If you are not moving do something, anything to change the situation..

Exhaust knocking?

Today I took the car to the garage and got my exhaust sorted. It was a minor bit of work, took them about half an hour. It had been knocking really badly until the pipe-work warmed up and more recently even after that. It sounded dreadful and was really irritating. Its been niggling at me for about 2 months. I would notice it as I drove away from the house and then forget it as soon as I got out of the car. But it was steadily getting worse and a friend remarked on it recently. It was a terrible noise, sounded as it something big was falling apart.

However despite all this and knowing exactly what it was, it took me two months to sort it out. Now its great. Sounds much better, no knocking, nice and smooth no matter how fast I go around bends. Its was so easy why didn't I do it ages ago?

Well there are many, many things in life that that. They are small and niggly and you don't sort them out. They needle and irritate and have the potential to become bigger issues if not dealt with. You know the sort of thing. Your partner never filling the car with petrol, your mates always getting the round in and getting you the wrong drink, your kids inviting friends around on homework nights, your boss assuming you'll do the overtime cos you are the only woman without children, your colleagues never filling the photocopier with paper or toner. Its these little things that don't get dealt with that can gnaw away at you leading to a flare up or can become a bigger issue like when you have limited time to catch a train and the car needs petrol on the way.

Just think how much better life could be if you dealt with those small issues today. Think how much smoother your day would be. Think how much stress you could remove with just one small adjustment. Think how easy it would be to address it.

What small niggly issue are you dealing with today? How will you reward yourself when its sorted.

Making Dreams Come True

Today one of my long desired dreams came true. I clipped into my skis outside my back door and skied off down into the village to the Post Office. Skiing from the back door is something I've wanted to do for a long time. We have a lot less snow in Cumbria than we used to so I've had to wait 6 years for the opportunity. Although there have been times when we've had sufficient snow before, I've always been away from home. Everyone in the village now think that I'm mad but I really enjoyed the experience. And it was a superb work-out too; I got home glowing and very very warm from the exercise. Later I was talking with a friend and she said how lucky I was to be able to do that. Well surprisingly I don't really believe in luck. Either you've sent an intention out to the universe that has delivered what you wanted or it's a combination of preparation meeting opportunity. I've been preparing for years; getting the right kit, learning the techniques, building confidence, watching and learning about the weather and the snow. And the opportunity was created because of the way that I've been managing my work. I'm having more concentrated periods of work and therefore longer periods at home. So to create your own luck you need to be preparing so that when that opportunity arises you are ready to jump right in. What's your heart's desire? What are you doing now to be ready when that opportunity presents itself?

New Year Revolutions

We live in the age of recycling and reusing.  At this time of year everyone is rushing around trying to keep to thier new year resulotions or trying to make some up if they got left out of the New Year hurly burly.  Trying here of course is the operative word.  And the problem with it is that as long as you tell yourself you are trying, that is all you will do.  You will keep trying and possibly never actually succeed. 

Its a very plucky thing to do, just keep trying.  Well I say that never mind new resolutions, just recycle the ones that you already have.  How's that for a revolution!  Well its easy really.  How many times last year did you say to yourself "I really must stop doing that" or maybe "I must rememebr that when I do X I need to do it that way" or maybe "I really should do X or Y this week". 

So my new year revolution is to advise you to just recycle all of those everyday resolutions that you made at any time last year.  These are only small things and they can make a big difference to your life.  Achieving suuccess in these small things, rather than just trying, will make you feel good about yourself and will spur you on to greater challenges.  And because they are small things they are not intimidating or difficult to achieve.

So get out all those tired old resolutions, dust them off and get cracking!!